I Blame My Parents

I have been given a lot of foods here that I have absolutely no idea what they are and would rather eat in blissful ignorance, foods that I know what they are and don’t want to eat, or foods that I know what they are and have absolutely no idea how to properly eat them. I, for the most part, have been doing well with all circumstances. If I have no idea what I am eating but it is decent, I continue eating it, without asking what is in it for fear my mind would win out over my stomach. If it is a food that I know I don’t like, I have adapted a good, take a bit, chew once, take a gulp of water, swallow, take a bite of bread method that has served me rather well. If I know what the food is but not how to eat it, I wait until someone else starts eating and follow suit. This last method was serving me very well, until yesterday.

My Señora spent the majority of the morning preparing a very traditional meal as both her sons were going to be joining us for lunch. Usually, since her sons seem to have a bit of trouble with punctuality, I eat before they arrive and then they eat and then we all go to the family room to talk after. For some reason, despite the fact that her sons came an hour and a half later than we usually eat, my Señora had me, my new roommate, my Señora and her two sons sit down together for lunch at a table that is a tight fit for three, let alone five. We were all sitting and talking, and then she handed me a plate with rice and an artichoke. Sure, I have eaten artichoke dip, but never a whole artichoke, is it even normal to eat such a thing?

So there I am, with my artichoke, trying to figure out how the heck I am going to eat this thing, I don’t even know what parts are supposed to be eaten. You would think my method of waiting, watching, and then eating would have worked, this assumption would be wrong. My Señora and one of her sons only had part of the artichoke and my roommate and the other son were eating their artichokes in completely different ways. I was totally lost and thought that the best course of action would be to just dig in. So, being the ever so food-cultured child that I am, I decided it would be a great idea to take a whole outer leaf, some rice, and shove it in my mouth. Upon chewing I realized that I had definitely taken the wrong course of action, but I still didn’t know how to properly eat the thing. I finally got the hang of it, or so I thought. I also thought I had been discreet enough in my lack of knowledge, but as I was finishing up my meal, my Señora says “Laura, here in Spain we eat artichokes like this” and demonstrates by taking a bite of the bottom of the leaf. And just when I thought I had conquered Spanish food…